Chris Cornell Email Admitting To Final Drug Relapse Revealed

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“He loved his life,” Chris Cornell’s widow Vicky told ABC News’ Robin Roberts in her first television interview since the family tragedy. “He would never have ever left this world.”

In the interview, Vicky shared a March 2017 email Chris sent admitting to a drug relapse, and details from an investigation into his autopsy by Dr. Richard Cote.

“Our family was his everything,” she said. “As soon as he got off stage, he was a dad, he was a regular dad.”

“He wanted to be there for his family, for his children. He loved his life,” Vicky Cornell said. “I don’t think that he could make any decisions because of the level of impairment.”

Dr. Richard Cote, the chair of the department of pathology at the University of Miami Miller School of Medicine, who conducted an independent analysis of Chris Cornell’s autopsy, told ABC News that two drugs found in his system at the time of his death may have resulted in impaired judgment and motor functions.

“They were not at levels that would’ve caused his death; in other words, it wasn’t an overdose,” Cote said. “But what the two drugs did individually and in combination was to really impair his judgment and make him psychically unable to be responsive in ways that he normally would be responsive.”

Vicky Cornell recalled the year before her husband’s death, when she said he fell back into addiction after being sober since 2003.

“Approximately a year before he died, he was prescribed a benzodiazepine to help him sleep,” she said. “He had torn his shoulder … the pain in the shoulder was waking him up at night and it was keeping him up.”

The new drugs changed her husband, she said.

“The brain of someone who has a substance use disorder is different from that of … someone who doesn’t,” Vicky Cornell said. “He relapsed.”

“He had really delayed speech,” she recalled of the dark time when her husband’s addiction took over. “He was forgetful.”

Last March, Chris Cornell reached out to a colleague for help, writing in an email, “Would love to talk, had relapse.”

Just two months later, he uncharacteristically walked off stage in the middle of what would turn out to be his final performance and died hours later in his hotel room.

Vicky Cornell said explaining what happened to her children the following day was “the most tragic thing you can ever go through.”

“They’re, you know, crying, ‘Is Daddy OK?’” she recalled. “And I said to my babies, “Yeah … the ambulance is there and they’re taking Daddy to the hospital, and I’m just going to go to the hospital.”

Watch the interview and see a screenshot of Cornell’s email admitting to relapsing below.

  • Jay Valente

    Still calling bullshit.
    Watched shows from a year before until present. The only show he seemed off was his last one.
    Ativan doesn’t make you rip your own hair out in frustration.

    • Olga Stewart

      Ah, so you noticed that missing part of hair on his head too?

    • Kay B

      I have his last show on DVD. This is not just a bald spot. It is red and angry in more way than one.

      • Jay Valente

        Yup

  • Raj

    If his motor functions were impaired and judgement impaired why was he still aware enough to know his Apple TV system wasn’t working and had to call someone to get it fixed? How did he know how to lock both doors in order so no one else could get in from the outside? How did he know how using one of the doors would be strong enough to hold his own weight? If he used the exercise band before many times how did he accidentally strangle himself to death this one time?
    If he had such a delayed speech and his brain wasn’t working why didn’t Vicky get another dr. or have him off these meds that changed his brain?

    • Trovoid

      Exactly. She is in such denial. They’re trying to convince us that a few extra benzos lead him to some highly impaired state.. The guy drank heavily and took other worse pills during the late 90s.. I think he could handle a couple extra Ativans.. Ativan probably delayed his suicide if anything. It was probably nice to get a bit more sleep and experience anxiety relief in general. From what we know, he had never attempted suicide before (even during those extreme rough patches). I guess it’d been a long time coming. Vicky should not be encouraged here, it is not healthy to reject his actual cause of death.

      • Kay B

        Agree. I get everyone reacts to drugs differently. He has been down the addict road. He knows what’s up. It could have very well delayed the suicide. I think he did relapse and had been for at least a yr or so. But Ativan made it easier to do what he did but didn’t make him do it. Look at all the prep work he did before hand. I know when I have benzos to sleep I slur my words too. I forget I ate a pint of Ben & Jerrys. I sometimes loose my balance. But I do know if I was about to hang myself.

        • Trovoid

          I wouldn’t doubt a relapse either. And I wouldn’t doubt that the Ativan made it easier for him to go through with suicide. That’s the part Vicky’s missing- that it gave him the courage.

          Yeah exactly. I’ve had times on benzos where I’ve blacked out the majority of the night. They always give me crazy munchies too. Vicky needs to understand that taking a benzo may turn you into a zombie in ways but not one who’s planning an elaborate suicide or anything. It’s not some major dissociative drug. They all sound so uneducated and stupid on Good Morning Generica.

          • Kay B

            I agree with you. Uneducated derps.

      • facepollution

        People are creating narratives based on their own perceptions – saying ‘I think he could handle a couple of extra Ativans’, how would anyone KNOW that. We also don’t know that he hadn’t attempted suicide before, plenty of people attempt suicide and don’t tell anyone.

        The problem with your last sentence is that people kill themselves for all sorts of reasons – his actual cause of death isn’t known. The literal cause is obviously suicide by hanging, but that doesn’t answer why. As I said before, suicide is the result of a number of unique factors coming together – therefore, it is entirely conceivable, and right to at least acknowledge that he was heavily under the influence when he did what he did, and had he not been, he MIGHT not have done what he did.

        • Trovoid

          I’m aware that people project their own beliefs onto cases like this. I also said “from what we know” he hasn’t attempted suicide before.

          You are right that suicide isn’t so black and white. I guess we’ll never know and that’s why we’re all trying to make sense of it. I’m open to the idea of Ativan being a factor in his death but not the actual cause of it. That’s the problem here. He might not have done what he did if he wasn’t on tour, wasn’t arguing with his wife, wasn’t suffering from migraines, wasn’t dealing with anxiety/depression, wasn’t so tired.. Vicky and her media circus are blaming Ativan solely for his death and that is just not accurate. They are acting like he was completely fine besides taking the pills.

          I understand the point you’re making though, we are all making assumptions.

          • facepollution

            Hey, I appreciate the civil response, I know emotions, my own included, can definitely run high in these kinds of discussions.

            If I may play devil’s advocate, I think it could be argued that Ativan was indeed to blame for most of those things you’re talking about. It seems clear that Chris had relapsed, as evident by the levels found in his system. Dealing with addicts is not easy, they do lie to cover up their behaviour, their behaviour does become more erratic, which can lead to arguments with concerned spouses, who may not know how best to deal with the situation. Then there is the shame and denial from addictive behaviour which further eat away at their self-esteem, and the cycle becomes self-perpetuating, contributing to anxiety, depression, insomnia, then throw in pressure of contractual obligations which were likely made before things became so bad.

            Thus, and this is where I believe Vicky is coming from, a recovering addict like Chris should not have been given a drug like Ativan, which is ripe for abusing. Watching the interview she gave, she does blame herself for not seeing what state he was really in. It’s very easy to look back in hindsight, and see the warning signs. What you perhaps see as a media circus, I saw as somebody trying to raise awareness about the perils of addiction, and being aware of those warning signs, and that people can do the unthinkable when they are that far under the influence. Of the people I know that have killed themselves, all of them were under the influence of either alcohol or drugs. Maybe it’s coincidence, but you can’t discount the fact that judgement would have be impaired.

            And for what it’s worth, Chris credited Vicky for saving him back when he was struggling with addiction at the start of Audioslave – if I remember correctly, Out Of Exile was how Chris recalled feeling when he got together with her and started a family. The reality is, that without finding that happiness, and reason to deal with his addiction, we may have lost him a lot sooner.

          • Trovoid

            I wish we knew if he relapsed on anything else besides taking all of the extra Ativan. I thought Chris was having his bodyguard hold onto the pills for him so I’m surprised he was able to take so many in such short time periods. Regardless, it’s the whole chicken and the egg situation. Maybe the pills were causing all these other aspects of behavior but you have to realize that something made him turn to the Ativan in the first place. He was sober for years (so we’re told) so you gotta wonder what happened in the last few years to make him get a prescription. I think Vicky focusing on drug addiction is irresponsible because clearly the drugs were only part of it. People relapse or turn to drugs when they’re going through rough patches, it’s not like he just randomly relapsed. Chris obviously wasn’t emotionally well if he felt inclined to keep popping those Ativan like they were candy. Why can’t Vicky admit that he probably wasn’t happy? He chose to take the pills and he chose to die. Denying his personal responsibility for both decisions is her just trying to make sense of his death.

          • facepollution

            In the interview she says he started taking the Ativan because he had torn something in his shoulder and he was having trouble sleeping as a result. So, a recovering addict is suddenly able to ‘legitimately’ use drugs because a doctor prescribes them, and continued use leads to a relapse. That’s not even vaguely tenuous, it’s a very logical step. Suddenly the more useful coping stratergies that he’d been using for years go out of the window.

            I’m not in any way doubting that he suffered with depression, but I really do believe he had coping strategies to deal with that – just look at how prolific he was after he left Audioslave, he had very little down time, and his career was thriving. From my own experiences with depression, when I hit a real low it is utterly debilitating, yet (as somebody else commented on here) his performances were pretty much consistently good, and he seemed to be enjoying what he was doing.

            Respectfully, I think people are taking Vicky’s words too literally – there is an obvious subtext there given Chris’ history with addiction. By all accounts, Chris didn’t have the best family life, and as with most adulthood problems, his problems with addiction most likely trace back to his upbringing. From the things his brother has posted, and the fact that Chris took his mother’s maiden name rather than his father’s name, I think it’s fair to assume that his childhood left him with a lot of baggage. These things stay with you, the ways you learn to cope as a child, escapism etc.

            One could argue that those addictive traits could in some way have benefits – in Chris’ case his striving for perfection. I remember reading a piece by Michael Beinhorn about Chris’ work ethic when they were recording Superunknown. He literally sang until he couldn’t sing any more, take after take, and when he couldn’t sing anymore, he would start over again as soon as he was able to. It’s certainly admirable, and probably hugely appreciated by a producer, but it’s a certain obsessive psychology that drives that type of behaviour, and it may well have been a double edged sword.

            I think the notion of personal responsibility with an addict is difficult to really quantify. I don’t want to condescend at all, but having been around people dealing with addiction, it’s very hard to apportion blame, when you know that their behaviour is a compulsion – it quite often takes for intervention before a person is able to face their demons. I guess Vicky’s take is that he had, to some extent ,conquered those demons, and for a fairly significant amount of time, but what she obviously didn’t realise was how quickly that could all change.

          • Olga Stewart

            But that shoulder injury took place back in 2013.

            So would he still need pain meds for that?

          • facepollution

            Hmm, she said a year before his death. Maybe a recurring problem.

          • Olga Stewart
          • facepollution

            Not to be facetious, but it is possible to injure a joint more than once, and that’s clearly not the incident that she was talking about. It may well have been a recurring injury in the same shoulder. He was obviously given the prescription for something, and given that Chris could have talked to anybody in his life about that, I don’t think she would really have made that up.

          • Olga Stewart

            Well, I am going by what I have read.

            If I’m wrong, then I apologize.

          • facepollution

            No need to apologise, I’m really not looking to score points here. My initial reason for responding to any of this was because of the sheer vitriol being thrown at Vicky. She’s lost her husband and the father of her children, even if she is wrong, cut her some slack, she’s a human being. That, and I think there are alternative explanations to everything that people have posted, and if I’ve learnt anything from years of back and forth arguments like this, it’s to show a bit of grace. Even if someone is being completely ignorant and obnoxious, rising to that kind of debate does nothing to move the conversation forward.

          • Olga Stewart

            I don’t really wish to express my feelings about Vicky.

            But I see where you are coming from.

            And thanks for sharing your views on this.

          • facepollution

            That’s fair enough, I won’t probe you on them – again, not to condescend, but all I’d say is being a good judge of character is more about keeping an open mind than coming to conclusions. That, and people do all kinds of crazy shit after they lose a loved one to suicide. A family friend remarried within three months of her husband’s death, and her deceased husband’s family were devastated by it. It’s kind of hard to argue with though, if that’s what enabled her to move on, so be it. Suicide is a brutal thing to try and reconcile, and I don’t think it’s fair to criticise people’s every step in the aftermath, no matter how crass or wrong they may seem.

            Anyway, I must sleep. Thanks again for the civil chat, I’m still trying to figure out my own feelings about Chris’ passing, but I think it has helped to discuss it.

          • Olga Stewart

            You’re most welcome. :).

            I do try to keep an open mind.

            But sometimes actions speak so loud, that it’s just about impossible to think otherwise.

            Though, I should work on that.

            Also, I hope that you have a good sleep.

        • Mountainous Man

          Yeah, I’m a bit shocked by all of the people around here implying they have any clue about this family trauma and how it went down.

    • facepollution

      That’s not what is being implied. A person doesn’t go from wanting to get their Apple TV fixed to completing suicide in such a short space of time without certain factors causing them to do so. The implication that his depression/anxiety suddenly overwhelmed him to the point of hopelessness simply doesn’t ring true. Purely from what has been stated, he had taken a large dose/multiple doses of his medication at some point after (maybe before) his performance, gotten back to his hotel room, tried to get his Apple TV fixed, then was left alone. Becoming more intoxicated, he suddenly did the unthinkable. So the question is why – and this is what they are getting at. I’ve no doubt that Chris suffered with anxiety and depression, he clearly did for his entire adult life. But there is no escaping the fact that he was intoxicated when he did what he did. People do crazy things when they are intoxicated, consequences suddenly become meaningless. And as certain drugs hit their peak in the system, it’s entirely conceivable that even if he had wanted to stop himself, he may not have had the physical ability to actually fix the situation. The term ‘a perfect storm’ is exactly right, a certain number of unique factors coalesce, but if you take one away you wouldn’t necessarily have the same result.

      In terms of Vicky making him come off the meds or switch doctor – Chris was his own person, and addicts are not easy people to deal with. They lie and make excuses to cover up their behaviour.

      • Olga Stewart

        Then how do you explain the tox report that says drugs did not contribute to his death?

        Also, I don’t believe I heard any mention of alcohol in his system.

        • facepollution

          The tox report is merely stating that he didn’t overdose on the drugs in his system, i.e they did not stop his heart. So technically, yes he died by his own hand, but, and this is the point Vicky is making, he was impaired by the drugs he had taken. When I say intoxicated, I mean by the Ativan, not alcohol.

          • Olga Stewart

            Thank you for explaining that.

            However, I don’t believe her version of events.

            So I guess we will have to agree to disagree.

          • facepollution

            That’s fair enough. I personally don’t think she really has any reason to lie – like I said before, people do all sorts of fucked up things when they’re under the influence. At the end of the day though, I think we’re all just searching for answers or some explanation after something like this. I’ve know a few people who’ve died in similar ways, and it is just brutal on the people left behind, utterly heart breaking 🙁

          • Olga Stewart

            I am very sorry to hear about the people (you have known) who have passed away.

          • facepollution

            Thanks. Honestly, Chris’ passing has been especially hard because I always found a lot of comfort in his music, and suddenly those songs now have a different meaning.

          • Olga Stewart

            You are welcome.

          • Cristiann

            Same here. Some of his songs (Wave Goodbye, Say Hello 2 Heaven, Fell On Black Days, etcs) are very painful to listen to now.

          • Kay B

            She has to save face that is why she would lie. She was in an argument with him on the phone and knew he was in an emergent situation. That is why she had security bust down the door. She has many reasons to lie. It would be easier to have her kids think he died of Ativan than depression. To admit he wasn’t happy. She is trying to get a payout from big pharma. She has plenty of reasons to lie.

          • Cristiann

            But how can it be proven that Ativan impaired his judgement that awful night?? The ME/toxicology report said that he hadn’t taken enough of those meds for that to be the case. And it doesn’t seem like Chris had any prior “episodes” under that medication before his death either. Honestly, I don’t know what or who to believe anymore.

      • Kay B

        A person would go from an Apple TV being fixed to a hanging after a very angry wife calls him on the phone and gets in a huge fight with her husband. Calling him out for his relapse and threatening to take the children away which she has done before.

        • facepollution

          Whilst totally conceivable, that is just a theory, you don’t know that to be the case – and if they did have a huge fight, presumably that would be because he was indeed intoxicated and slurring his words as she stated, her reaction, like many souses’, would have been through fear and concern for his wellbeing.

          People are creating narratives based on their perceptions of Vicky – like Trovoid saying ‘I think he could handle a couple of extra Ativans’, how would anyone KNOW that. We also don’t know that he hadn’t attempted suicide before, plenty of people attempt suicide and don’t tell anyone.

          • Kay B

            It is respectful to not use others’ names in comments unless you ask. If you have a problem with a comment comment to them.

            Where have you been? They did have a fight right before and after that concert. And your last sentence is contradictive. Are you saying no one knows of an attempt or that he did and hid it?
            The only one creating narratives is Vicky. She didn’t have concern for his well being as you state. She knew he should not have been touring. But as I have said before someone has to fed the monkey. If she cared about this man so much especially after his death, she would have made it to the coroner’s office on time to discuss his death. I can see why your handle would suit you.

          • facepollution

            Actually I tried to remove the last paragraph of my reply to you, as you might have noticed I posted a rephrased version reply to that user. I’ve only just woken up, so I’ll blame it on being a bit bleary eyed. Arguably it’s not particularly respectful to trash the spouse of a recently deceased person, there’s a chance she cared about him even more than any of us, just a chance though.

            My last sentence isn’t contradictive at all, the problem is none of us know the whole story of his struggles with mental illness and addiction – that’s the point I’m making, far too many people are talking as if they know the facts, when they don’t at all.

            This always happens after incidences like this, people start creating characters based on shards of information, and how they feel towards that person – she may have had a valid reason for being late to the coroner’s office, we don’t know that, but why not come to a conclusion anyway.

            I’m gonna wrap this up here, I bowed out on endless back and forth online arguments a few years back, because they are usually utterly futile, and I’m annoyed with myself that I’ve gotten sucked back in……my point, for the record, isn’t that I know what happened to him, it is that none of us know all of the factors that led to his death, a lot of people seem to think they do, and hey, that’s their prerogative, but it doesn’t make it any more true. Oh, and finally, your last insult…..come on, you’re better than that. That song was playing when I had to come up with a handle many moons ago.

          • Kay B

            I’m better than that…I don’t think we have interacted long enough for you to be that intimate. For the record as well I’m annoyed with you too.

          • facepollution

            Intimate?! We should all be better than that, insulting someone because they disagree with you isn’t cool. I think the common thread we all have is the sadness that Chris’ life ended how it did. Annoyed that I’d propose a different side of the coin? I think your ire is misdirected, I’m just trying to say that none of us should presume we know the ‘real’ reason why his life ended.

          • Kay B

            Your lack of sense of humor is disturbing.

  • Allison Auld

    She provided that very personal email written by her beloved deceased husband for public consumption? It’s that important to her to let everyone know that he had a relapse and didn’t die by suicide (which he did, regardless)? She’s friends with Talinda Bennington. She should take Talinda’s lead and try dealing with a horrific situation with class and dignity, even advocacy.

    • Allison Auld

      And please do not also invade the privacy of your preteen children. The world doesn’t need to know that they were crying and saying, “Is Daddy OK?” That’s their story to tell, when and if they choose to tell it. My God – those poor children.

      • Kay B

        Exactly. She was mentioning how her and the kids are being bullied yet she lets this personal stuff roll off her tongue.

  • qc

    The big question for me is why didn’t they cancel the tour and seek some treatment, rehab, etc.? The fact that the meds had to be given to him by the bodyguard suggests that they were controlling the amount he was taking, that he didn’t have access to the pill bottle. But why not stop doing this med and finding another one?

    I have cried my eyes out of hearing of an exam sort of like DNA for pharmacogenetic (pardon me if I got the name wrong) but the thing is able to test which drugs will do harm or good with great precision. I just heard it from a journalist that struggled with depression for 40 years and for the first time is taking the right med, he found out everything he had taken was plain wrong for him. I’ve also struggled with wrong antidepressants for about 4 years before a doctor stopped the cycle for my bipolar disorder so knowing that there is a test that can prevent lives being ruined made me very emotional. Here in my country it’s quite expensive but for the love of anything you hold dear, Chris could afford such tests. If anything the one to blame isn’t the medicine but the irresponsible doctor. I don’t even think anyone could be taking that drug for so much time.
    I struggled because my doctor insisted on the same 2 antidepressants combo and another one that had me committed for almost 2 months in a mental hospital at age 16. And it was the minimal dose, the one that wouldn’t affect anyone or so they thought at the time(2006). Ever since another doctor took that combo away(2011) I’ve been stable, no manic episodes at all.

    Still I don’t blame the medicine as it works for other people. It’s just unfortunate that I was almost a lab rat for my doctor and actually now these antidepressants are pretty much banned for bipolar disorder.

    Anyways… we can’t rewind time. Here the full audio of the last concert I’ve seen him, only released by a fan after he passed away. It’s really sad because before the first song he says that Before we disappear is about being aware that life is short so we should let the people we love know this before is too late.
    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rRrzx4fTdD0

    • Olga Stewart

      I am very sorry to know what you had to deal with in regards to that idiotic doctor.

      But I am very glad to know that you are both on the right meds and that you are doing much better.

    • Kay B

      He should not have been touring. Why would his wife knowing he was relapsing not suggest he get help and stop touring which could have been a trigger? She claims she knows him so well, then get him help when he needed it.

  • Renée Lynn

    This whole story is BS, lies lies lies.

  • Sophie

    CLEAN. TOX. REPORT.

  • Olga Stewart

    This comes out now?

    I’m sorry but I don’t believe a word of it.

    But even if he did relapse, why didn’t someone try to help him?

    This just gets worse and worse, now doesn’t it?

  • Trovoid

    I’ve had enough of all this. This chaos seems like it is never going to dwindle down. I respect this man way too much to be a part of this circus any longer. I sincerely hope that these freaks are out of the news very soon otherwise I’m going to have to avoid these articles completely. It’s too much for me to deal with anymore and I’m glad Chris can rest peacefully now. He doesn’t have to face the humiliation of all this media bullshit. Vicky can take his death personally until the day she dies. I hope you’re proud of yourself, you bitch. I’d kill myself too if I was married to such a corporate whore.

    • Olga Stewart

      Trovoid, please take care of yourself.

      You’re too important to some of us to be feeling this way.

      So if you need to avoid the articles or take a break, then please do so.

      And I am thinking of you.

      • Trovoid

        Thank you for always being such a kind soul, Olga.

        I realized after posting that a lot of anger and frustration was conveyed in my comment. I will definitely still be around here. Life just gets very overwhelming for me at times. How I wish we lived in a world that faced truths and didn’t bury them.

        “Money can’t give what the truth takes away”

        • makingconnections

          Trovoid: My posts are being taken down so I won’t blab on, just want to say I wish you all well and send you, Olga, Kay, and Corndog love always!
          I hope this stays up for long enough for you to get my message.

          • Trovoid

            Why are your posts still being taken down? Are you causing more shenanigans on here?! Same to you, love. I hope you are doing well.

          • Corndog

            I’m not sure what is going on. I can’t see any deleted posts from MC in disqus.

          • Trovoid

            That’s odd. It’s been happening for the past month or so.

          • Corndog

            Yeah it’s strange. I can’t explain it.

          • makingconnections

            Thanks Corndog!

          • Corndog

            Could be an issue with disqus itself. I can’t imagine Brett would have deleted your posts as there was nothing wrong in them, and even if he did they should still show as being posted by you, not ‘guest’.

            Computers. They’re a pain in the arse:)

          • makingconnections

            I’m doing fine thanks Trovoid…bewildered by this though because some of the posts are not offensive but maybe I’m just on here too much or being irritating or some such thing. I don’t like feeling inappropriate, but probably when you are you don’t realize it?! I know I’ve really ticked of one poster particularly. Oh well, I’ll keep trying to participate and if it doesn’t work out I’ll not be outraged over V.Cornell, but I’ll miss you lot!

          • Trovoid

            I think it’s a technical error. There is no way you are offensive enough to get your posts deleted. The rest of us have said much worse. And you are never irritating!! I don’t think any of the mods are personally singling you out. I really wonder what’s happening here.

          • Olga Stewart

            Like I said before, we all should be so lucky to create havoc as you do.

            And I mean that in a good way. :).

          • Corndog

            Same to you MC:)

            I had a quick look in the deleted section in Disqus admin and there are no posts there with your name on them. I went back 4 days and i can’t see any deleted posts from you at all. That’s weird. Normally any deleted posts would show there, whether deleted by admin or the user themselves.

          • Corndog

            Ok, i have found 3 posts that i think were made by you but they are listed as posted by ‘guest’. That normally happens when someone that has posted has then deleted their account or if someone has been banned from the site, but that can’t be the issue here as this one i’m replying to now still shows your user name. I’m going to try and approve those 3 posts and see what happens. Two secs.

          • Olga Stewart

            Thank you to you, as well. :).

          • Olga Stewart
          • makingconnections

            Thank you so much for this! I find those two completely enchanting and now to hear them skate to “The Hip”, what could be better!
            My posts seems to be holding up….very strange.

          • Olga Stewart

            You are most welcome. :).

            And I’m sorry to hear about what is happening to your posts.

            I do hope that this gets sorted out quickly for you.

          • makingconnections

            Yes, when you can’t talk on Alternative Nation it feels like the earth isn’t situated on it’s axis properly! It’s odd that as soon as I mentioned it, it seems to be fine. Oh well….

        • Olga Stewart

          You are most welcome. :).

        • Olga Stewart

          Yes, this world need both more truth and decency.

    • Kay B

      It really is a circus. I recorded this interview and all I could think about is how in huge bold letters they put 7 DIFFERENT DRUGS were in his system. We all what they were and what they were for. This poor man is being made out to be a druggie. I believe he had been relapsing for awhile. But a relapsed doesn’t mean he didn’t know what he was doing that night. period. Notice not one tear was shed.

      • Trovoid

        Oh I know, Kay. I rolled my eyes so hard at that. He may have relapsed with booze or pills or whatever at some point but if anything I bet he relapsed because he was already depressed/suicidal. Vicky thinks it’s the other way around. She doesn’t realize that he was self-medicating his mental health issues. In her mind she wants to think of him as a happy guy who had the disease of addiction. A narcissistic woman can’t handle the hit to her ego and admit to people that her husband willingly left the world. She has to make it about her.

        IT’S ALL B.S. KAY B

        • Kay B

          Nail on head. She has it backwards. He relapsed because he was depressed. I fear the kids will be afraid to come up to her if they happen to have depression in the future.

          • Olga Stewart

            Which is why I have always worried about both Toni and Chris Jr.

  • Kay B

    #NOMOREBULLSHIT

    • Olga Stewart

      And there had to be a reason that he tweeted that.

  • Cristiann

    I’m so tired of all the craziness that surrounds Chris’ death. Honestly, I don’t know what or who to believe anymore. Everything that VK has said over the last 9 months is very contradicting imo.

    She says Chris wasn’t depressed and that he loved his life/children (as if you can’t love the people in your life AND still struggle with mental illness???), but it’s clear as day that Chris wasn’t happy or healthy in those last few months. She claims that he had a drug relapse, which I’ll admit at this point that it’s certainly possible, but if that’s the case then why didn’t someone intervene sooner? I know Chris was a grown man and it is no one’s place to tell him what to do, but I think something more should have been done to help him. If she knew he was in a lot of physical pain, had trouble sleeping, etcs, then why didn’t they cancel the tour so he could rest more? Why didn’t they switch to a different doctor or at least try different medications to see if he could feel an improvement? Why was he traveling so much (like to Greece for charity events) if she knew Chris was feeling so unwell? Why have his body cremated so soon if she still has so many questions? I don’t understand any of this tbh. And frankly, if all this is true then I’m not at all surprised that Chris’ depression only got worse. It sounds like he was in a lot of pain and was struggling to deal with way too much on his own.

    Mental and physical illnesses are not mutually exclusive. People can struggle with both at the same time. I don’t doubt that Chris loved his children; hell, I don’t doubt that he loved his wife in spite of everything, but I also don’t doubt that he was really depressed towards the end of his life. And yes, sometimes depression leads to addiction (or sometimes it happens the other way around), but there is no legitimate evidence that a drug relapse impaired Chris’ judgement on the day he died. I’m so sick of this “benzo addiction” narrative that VK continues to push at us. Personally, I don’t think its a good idea to put someone on meds like that when you know they have a history of depression and addiction, but at the same time I also know those meds help a lot people and sometimes even save lives. Vicky is not a doctor and has ZERO education in the medical field — these opinions that she shares are just that: opinions. It’s very irresponsible of her to not only bad mouth certain meds, but it’s also wrong for her to continue to deny mental illness played a big part in her husband’s death. I wish she would just stop with the nonsense already.

    • Olga Stewart

      Shortly after his death, I read somewhere that he didn’t want to do that last tour because the band wasn’t promoting an album.

      So he was talked into it

      Maybe if he hadn’t been touring, he still might be with us?

      • Cristiann

        Maybe … sadly, we’ll never really know. It honestly didn’t make sense for Soundgarden to tour when 1) they weren’t even promoting a new album, 2) Chris had recently finished touring with Temple of the Dog, 3) he was also promoting The Promise and 4) he was feeling really bad at the time. He shouldn’t have been working and traveling so much. I wish he had chosen to take some time to himself and rest.

        • Olga Stewart

          I just wonder if he would have been allowed to both take that time and to rest?

          • Cristiann

            I don’t see why not? I mean, I know a lot of these type of events are usually planned in advance, and I suppose contracts would be involved most of the time, but I can see him being able to find a way out of it somehow. I don’t know why he chose not to take a (much needed) break instead. 🙁

          • Olga Stewart

            What I’m trying to get at is that someone might have wanted to continue touring for a particular reason.

            And I think you can guess who I am referring to

  • suz

    WHAT TWO DRUGS? you’d think, if this was legit, they’d go into great detail how these two drugs could cause this horrific event. you’d think if this is at all to be believed that they’d scream out loud DON’T TAKE THESE TWO DRUGS TOGETHER!

    can we get a closer look at the email to ‘colleague’? i’m sure we can’t be certain who wrote it.

    i thought she had no idea of his relapse or, in her words, “she didn’t see it.”?

    according to her claims of slurred speech yahti blah, she would have seen signs of it two months previous to his death. what’s w/the ‘sudden and unexpected’ statement from her made immediately that morning?

    she’s problematic.

    • makingconnections

      It seems that controlling the narrative has become confusing and it’s almost like being caught in a web of deceit. That’s how it appears to me anyway. Maybe she actually believes all of this nonsense….that would be O.K., sad but O.K. were it not for the fact that Chris Cornell deserves dignity in death. She’s tampering with something so precious.

  • Olga Stewart

    The e-mail bothers me because of the organization (or lack thereof) of it.

    It goes from talking about music straight into having had a relapse.

    So it sounds something like why don’t you send the mix to so and so and while we’re about it, I need to talk about my relapse.

    It’s disjointed, random, and doesn’t sound right (meaning I don’t think it sounds like Chris).

    And given how wonderfully Chris wrote the lyrics for his songs, I somehow doubt he would be writing like this in an e-mail.

    If I’m wrong, then I apologize.

    But still it bothers me.

  • Olga Stewart

    Also, I wonder if Chris’s kids seen that ‘e-mail’ on the tv?

    If so, I can’t even imagine how hurtful that must have been.