Chris Cornell’s brother Peter posted a beautiful tribute to his brother Chris last week to mark the 8 month anniversary of his death.
In about 3 hours it will be 8 months. 8 months since AMY woke me up at 2am and told me something that has changed me. Maybe forever. It’s possible that I’m grieving improperly. That by now I should be able to listen to a Soundgarden song on the radio without choking up.
We were in the car the other day and Burden in My Hand came on. Amy was driving and she said she looked over at me and my eyes were closed and I was gripping the armrest on the door so tightly she thought I would tear it off. Maybe I should be over it by now. But I’m not. I don’t write this as a “big boo hoo” or a “look at me look how tortured I am.” I write because I am hoping you relate. That we connect in space over our losses and find that inkling of solace that we are not alone.
That’s been a mantra for me that has taught me how to heal from the self inflicted wounds of chasing my demons. I am not alone. If I’ve experienced it, so has at least one other person. And probably 10 or a hundred or a thousand people. For me that’s where the hope begins. Strength in numbers. I was thumbing through the archives looking for a picture to post tonight. This one caught my eye.
My Brothers. Babies. Innocents. My Great Grandmother’s front lawn. I go back to that house in my dreams often. Some kind of unsolved business there I guess. Maybe I’ll go back tonight. I’ll hug those lads and tell them I love them. One of them I haven’t known for years, the other one…8 months. Love to the children. 3 angels. I hope they know this old dog loves them. Goodnight Brother. I miss you!