Tool Singer Maynard James Keenan Sold Fake Drugs To Rock Legend

Photo credit: Lauryn Schaffner for

In a new Vice Munchies interview, Tool and A Perfect Circle singer Maynard James Keenan discussed selling ‘fake crank’ to the drummer of Husker Du. “Crank” is slang for a low purity, crystallized Methamphetamine that is administered in a powder form.

“I saw Hüsker Dü play in Fort Wayne, Texas when I was stationed there in 1985. And I think I sold the drummer some fake crank. It was actually just NoDoz in a plastic bag. And he gave me the thumbs up… I probably wouldn’t have gone to Husker Du on this pairing, but I get the buzzsaw tension. I would have gone with My Bloody Valentine.”

Keenan also said, “I used to eat out like this…when I could recover more easily. I found that I can’t do that [now]. I played sports in high school, so there’s an ‘eye on the ball’ aspect to everything I do. The ball for me tomorrow is the [A Perfect Circle] show [at MSG]. I have some jiu jitsu tomorrow, but even that’s secondary because it warms up my body for the show. So as soon as we’re done with this, I’m going back to the hotel, there’s a bathtub, and I’m going to watch a couple episodes of Ozark. …And by Ozark, I mean Sex and the City.”

  • Kitty Meow

    “I used to eat out like this…when I could recover more easily” wtf does that even mean?

    • curtyct

      Thank you Evan on the off chance that’s verbatim to what Maynard said how bout some context, Grammer f****** punctuation I don’t know something to explain this gibberish

    • Rhiannon James

      I highly doubt they do.. Effing morons..

  • Hiro Beats

    Dude is English your native language or are you high as fuck? Rewrite this shit coherently.

  • Geniu Mecanic

    Is this a story? Can you hire a translator?

  • UltraAK

    Maynard trying to be too cute…..AGAIN. Just give us the Tool album already….

  • mike reidenbach

    Who gives a fck about Maynard. He didn’t mention brushing his wigs and doing his makeup like a wannabe be bitch he is

    • billy arrington

      Boooo this man

      • Just The Truth

        For telling the truth?

        • billy arrington

          No, for the who gives a fuck about Maynard. Personally, I can’t wait for new tool music.

          • Just The Truth

            I get it, I have a friend that lives for Tool. He sends me Tool songs and demands listen. I thought I heard a wee bit of a Pink Floyd influence…..

          • billy arrington

            I can see the pink floyd influence. Especially with the live performances. I’ve seen tool several times, only pink floyd live DVDs.

          • billyarrington gg

          • Just The Truth

            Thanks, I was wondering if it was just me that heard a little Pink Floyd. I haven’t seen either one of them.

      • Darrin Fratus


    • Just The Truth

      Is he trying to look like Alice Cooper? If so it’s working.

  • Jeffery V Nelson

    I bet he is secret gay….. Just saying….

    • Kitty Meow

      He is secret gay?! Ya think?!
      And nobody wants to see your video ya moron.

      • billy arrington

        Ha ha ha

    • billy arrington

      Isn’t he married?

  • sharkguitar

    Never buy crank from Keenan.

  • Rhiannon James

    That was ABSOLUTE RUBBISH and definitely A LOAD OF SHIT.

  • John White

    Title should read “Rock Legend sells drugs to Washed Up drug addicted musician!”

  • evi1p3ngu1n

    Man you guys will report anything. Nothing gets run through a filter. You dumbasses really think this happened? Hilarious.

  • HippieChic61

    Pffft, What a tool!

  • JC 40324

    I think maybe the Mandela Effect totally screwed this article up, but on this pairing, I get the tension.

  • Darrin Fratus

    Stupid this makes me hate Maynard even more what a tool….. tee hee pretentious and “artsy” both bands are sinking into the pit of forgotten idiots that no one cares about. Food gives you a hangover??? Just hurry up and stop making music so ignorant reporters don’t post your life events thinking that its relevant information

  • AButtWithNoHole

    I’m not entirely sure about what he means by “recover,” due to the fact that MJK is, himself, not a drug addict nor has he ever been one, to my knowledge.

    However, I will state, whoever published this article forgot to include a vital piece of background information nessecary for understanding the context in which underlies the majority of what is being discharged in the article.

    By “pairing,” he [MJK] is referring to wine and food and music pairings.

    The link below will explain more into that: